Oscar is five days old.

and this is the first time i’ve gotten online – the withdrawal has been almost more painful than…um…bits of me. i ache in the places where i used to play, indeed, but am joyful – if sleepy – in spirit. he’s here. he’s lovely. he’s mine…er…ours. and he will be okay.

he is also, like his mama, a big ol’ sleepy lump. the main complications of his prematurity are jaundice, which he’s making a good recovery from, and a complete inability to wake up for more than five minutes at a time. this makes feeding rather difficult, even now that he’s off IV and out of the little “tanning bed” they had him in for the jaundice – he opens his little mouth fiercely, latches onto the nipple, and promptly falls dead asleep. when he does open his eyes (such beautiful, blurry little eyes, i preen to myself), he looks very much like his father after far too many beer.

so…we’ll be here, in the NICU, for a little while yet. yesterday he graduated from Intensive Care to Intermediate Care, a milestone celebrated with much yawning on his part. he eats by tube or finger-feeding mostly, and i pump for him like a faithful, diligent bovine. i am a little overwhelmed by all of this…but patience is a virtue i need to work on, in any case. :)

thanks to everybody for the love sent our way from all over…when we can get Oscar to a computer we will read him all the kind messages aloud, letting him know how very welcomed he is.