Comments on: on Thisbe, on Mother’s Day

By: Emily R

Emily R — Wed, 14 May 2008 21:28:26 +0000

You told this perfectly. The tribute is telling the story.

By: beruriah

beruriah — Wed, 14 May 2008 01:52:35 +0000

Wow. This story isn’t that far in the past for your family, but it strikes me still how some traumas are remembered across generations.

By: Laurie

Laurie — Tue, 13 May 2008 20:38:25 +0000

I meant to add after the picture: The tale says Thisbe was listening at the crack in the wall for her lover, Pyramus.

Thisbe could also be straining hard to hear the laughter of her child at play; the night time tears of a child separated from her mother.

There are really so many ways to lose a child.

Death, illness (theirs or yours; mental or physical), neglect, estrangement.

It scares me, sometimes, as the parent of adult children, who, yes, are alive and close in spirit.

Now.

Circumstances could intefere at any time. Fate is indeed a cruel mistress.

Walk around feeling like a leaf,
Know that you could tumble at any second…

~ Naomi Shihab Nye

By: Laurie

Laurie — Tue, 13 May 2008 19:33:45 +0000

Bon,

A heartbreaking tale. You often hear stories from “those days” how children were given up to siblings with fewer/no children “for their own good,” when there was trouble in the home. I think it was felt by many then that as long as the children were adequately fed and watered, that was pretty much all they needed. Harsh times, indeed. However, it sounds like your mother found love, and tender hearted care, in that cozy little back room.

My father still mourns his mother, who died when he was five. How much harder for little Barbara who, for a few years, knew her mother was just across the street, yet out of reach to her.

On a lighter note, your “come-by-chance” phrase reminds me of the Newfie phrase for an unexpected baby – a “merry-begot.”

Perhaps, your grandmother’s very name doomed her to a tragic life cut short. Have you seen this representation of Thisbe? http://www.pantheon.org/areas/gallery/mythology/other/thisbe.html

By: Pendullum

Pendullum — Tue, 13 May 2008 14:15:00 +0000

Must have been the hardest thing in the world to give up her daughter to her sister for your mother’s well being…
And I imagine that she would have to be gruff so that the decision would be okay for your mother…So that your mother could move on and have opportunity where she had none…

By: Kyla

Kyla — Tue, 13 May 2008 13:51:20 +0000

Wow. This was gorgeous.

By: cinnamon gurl

cinnamon gurl — Tue, 13 May 2008 10:58:33 +0000

You have such a gift for storytelling.

By: Mrs. Chicken

Mrs. Chicken — Tue, 13 May 2008 01:05:57 +0000

This is extraordinarily beautiful, Bon. Hoping you had a wonderful mother’s day, and your mom, too.

By: Mad Hatter

Mad Hatter — Tue, 13 May 2008 00:23:54 +0000

The spectres in my family are all men. Fathers and grandfathers lost to disease; mothers and grandmothers lost to self-sacrifice. I’ve often wondered who I would be if that circumstance were opposite from what it is. To Thisbe. And to your Nan who stepped in with love and maternal affection.

By: Traci

Traci — Mon, 12 May 2008 23:13:29 +0000

I understand. Our first loyalty goes to the people who are still here, and value it.

Thisbe is a beautiful name! I keep pairing it up with your favorites…