I do know from experience that Pitocin ups the intene factor significantly. It put me into hard labour within 20 minutes of hook up. That said, it sped things long and I had an epidural so I didn’t feel much besides pressure. If you get Pitocin I would strongly consider an epidural.

I wish you the best experience possible so you can fully enjoy the delicious package of pink in your arms afterwards.

xo
J.

PS: I love your pregnant pic.

Baby #1: No induction, labor started on its own and proceeded slowly. So far, so good according to the 4 page birth plan (yes, we’re both type A & we studied/planned obsessively). When I finally got to the pushing part, it lasted 2 hours with no progress and I was exhausted since we’d been in labor 24 hours. It was determined that an emergency C-section was needed as the shoulders weren’t going to budge.

Didn’t hold baby for 4 hours after birth, and even then felt like I would drop her because I was so groggy from the anti-nausea drugs and being tired.

Baby #2: After 3 months on bed rest on account’a my cervix being 100% effaced & 1 cm dilated at 17 weeks, I ended up with an induction. (I should’a known right then and there what a hand-full that girl was going to be!) They let me try for a VBAC (not usually done nowadays, I hear) and I was determined to deliver drug-free – until the first contraction with the pitocin kicked in. Yowza is all I have to say! John was in the hall chatting up the guy who did the episiotomies and I nearly killed him for delaying the good doctor! But I did succeed with the VBAC, no complications except the episiotomy (which I did NOT want).

Held the baby SECONDS after birth for a good long while, and had the magical post-birth skin-on-skin contact I’d dreamed about. Nursed immediately and it was great. I did not hold while being stitched, but everyone else wanted a turn holding anyway, so all was well.

My assessment: Induction is 0 to 60 in 2 seconds or less, so watch out. C-section was WAY easier to recover from than vaginal, but perhaps it was the pain meds I had after the C-section (not being able to sit comfortably for a week after the vaginal SUCKED).

I had a 31 hour labor with my first and a five hour labor with my second. The first was 24 hours unmedicated, including several after we had to start pitocin, and it was so very hard. The second was induced, with (and this is KEY) the epidural given at about the same time as the pitocin, and it was a walk in the park. No pain, no numbness, no tearing. I know. I hated me for it too. :-)

All I’m saying is, especially if there’s a medical reason for it, an induction can be wonderful. But if you do the pitocin, do the epidural. It’s no less natural, and it counters the hard fast breathtakingness of the pitocin contractions.

My vote, honestly, would be the induction. I had one with baby#2, and it wasn’t horrible. I did end up with an epidural (a perfect one, if possible; I could feel enough to push but not the pitocin contractions that were one on top of another). Beginning to end? Five hours, and that was starting from a dialation of less than 2cm. I ended up with an episiotomy both times, and it seemed to heal a lot better the second time; could be because there wasn’t the use of a vacuum that time, or I just handled it better. Regardless, the induction is controlled in that you know when, and you know who. While that may not help to get rid of a PTSD issue, it may help you to prepare yourself a bit better. I didn’t have a God-awful delivery like you have had, but it wasn’t a walk in the park either. With the induction, I had time to wrap my head around it, prepare myself, and I think that I was a lot better-I didn’t even dry heave like the first time (nothin’ but nerves, which I now know).

Good luck with whatever decision you and your OB make together. You’re in the home stretch!

Pitocin is not so nice, but your labors sound fairly intense anyway. I would look very hard at your Bishops Score with your OB (it measures the likelihood that your induction will work.) just to avoid the drama of long, painful labor followed by a surgical birth b/c your labor doesn’t move. If you Bishops is good, you might not mind the pitocin so much – and there is always an epidural (Which is the same anesthesia used for a c-section) if the pain is off the chart. I know not everyone is into epidurals and that’s cool. I’ve just seen them really take the stress out of a scenario in certain birthing situations – which is great b/c then we can concentrate on the mama baby connection and not the pain. Epidurals do slow things down, but that might not be so bad for you.

I will tell you that I tore very, very badly with my second. No one could even discuss degrees with me because it was in multiple directions. I was being stitched for an hour. The baby was not lined up very well and corkscrewed out. No one was doing perineal massage during pushing & a few things were not managed well at the time. With my third – who was almost a full pound bigger – I did not tear a bit. I labored (not delivered) in warm water and used evening primrose oil capsules for 3 weeks before delivery (37 weeks onwards)
I bled very heavily after my first, even though my placenta had looked okay, something was amiss and I was badly anemic for months. My next two deliveries included pitocin administered immediately after the birth to make my uterus cramp down on the placenta – nursing babies will do this too, but sometimes newborns are not super-efficient right away, like if they are in a sleep state – I also underwent vigorous abdominal massage to prevent the hemorrhaging. It was effective, though unpleasant.

If you can get your own OB doc to sign off on everything you are hoping for, maybe the on-cal docs will go along with it? I’ve seen that happen a few times.
Wishing you the very, very best.

Like you said, only so much we can prepare, and when the time comes, we just roll with it. However, you can mentally and emotionally prepare ahead of time. Visualize. The ideal birth. Write down all your fears, each on a sheet of paper, and then ask yourself, what can I do about this? Do I need this fear? If there are solutions, write them down. If not, if you do not need those, burn them. Forget about them.

There are things you can do for anxiety: ~Aromatherapy. Find a smell that grounds you and give you energy. Bring that with you into birth. Put it on your pulse points, pillowcase, whatevers..

~Touch. Find a place where, when Dave touched you, you will find strength and peace. Breathe into that place. Tell him to touch you there when you need it. When he touches you there, know that you have strength.

Bach Flower Rescue Remedy. Helps with anxiety attacks.

~Homeopathy- there are also homeopathic medicines that can help with anxiety. I used that prior to my wisdom teeth surgery in January this year. helped a lot. There are different types for different things. Let me know if you want more info.

~Sound- can you play music for calming? Can you make a sound yourself that helps you tune into yourself, your primal self, that is powerful and yet knows how to surrender? some women use a mantra during birth. whatever you want. don’t care what others think. some people use, “open, open, open”. for you, maybe you need, “slow down slow down.” or “stretch slowly, etc” some people just use an “Oh….” or “ahhhhh” sound. just keep it a low sound. Ask Dave to remind you of that sound. start using that sound now.

Empower yourself now. Do some yoga or stretches that makes you strong. Birth is so physical. Walk. Put on some music and dance and sway with your baby. Talk to her, tell her your fears, your dreams…

I’d also go ahead and use the Evening Primrose.

Letting baby suckle at your breast should help placenta to dislodge. Talk to your OB before about this, and all other issues. Tie him to the bed while you stand over him and ask him questions.

Thinking all the good vibes for you, Bon. You look awesome, and what a journey it has been… you’ve done it all with amazing grace. xoxo

I’m not much help with the birth thing but I’ve had 2 c-sections and I’ve never been in labor. I’m a diabetic & when I went in for my induction (babe had stopped growing – IUGR) Hollis was in distress & I had a section 20 minutes later.

I can tell you that a c-section can be much less scary if planned. (Assuming you can make it to 38 weeks. I never did). Even if you present in labor they can still do a c-section to prevent some of your other complications. A c-section w/o 2 hours of unproductive pushing first is much easier to recover from.

When I had the section with Hollis, the neonatologists took him right away (for obvious reasons). With my second, however, I got to hold Holden while they finished up my section (probably 30 minutes). Then I got him back about 10 minutes after they moved me out of recovery and into my room. They didn’t take him for all the other testing, etc… until after I’d had plenty of time with him to try breastfeeding several times and snuggle lots.

I’ll be thinking of you.

P.S. Amazing picture. Kate rocks.