Archive for May, 2009

Saturday, May 30th, 2009

when i grow up

when i was four, i wanted to be a ballerina. i think it was the tutus. you couldn’t just buy a kid a dressup tutu at the Woolworth’s back then; dressup was old plastic jewellry and mom’s clunky platform shoes to break an ankle in. unless you had a real live ballerina in the family, […]

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Monday, May 25th, 2009

partum, post

she’s been out now longer than she was ever in. yesterday marked sixteen months since the day i found out i was pregnant with Posey. it was an eight-month pregnancy that felt like eighty. and eight and a half months later, i think i’m finally recovered-ish. send flowers. they say we humans have a fourth […]

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Thursday, May 21st, 2009


in my town, there’s a former suburb, long since absorbed into the city limits, rich with ’50s bungalows, called Sherwood. in a nod to somebody’s idea of clever literary allusion, most of its street names follow a woodsy theme – Pine, Maple, Oak, Ferndale, Heather – so that taken as a whole, you got yourself […]

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Sunday, May 17th, 2009

if we don’t get a holiday

Her Majesty Queen Victoria doesn’t look like a terribly good time. she’s got that forbidding gaze, the beak of a nose, the turned-down mouth that makes it shocking that she ever had to say, “We are not amused” aloud.  surely a glance at her dour visage would’ve scared the living snot out of whomever was […]

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Tuesday, May 12th, 2009

shut the f*ck up Bonnie

years ago, after a few shots of honesty absinthe on a concrete balcony one October evening, Dave and i got to talking about having kids. i was thirty, he was turning twenty-eight.  we were living in separate apartments in the bleak  post-Soviet suburbs of the Hapsburg Empire, where we taught English to aspiring supermodels and […]

61 Comments » - Posted in issue stuff,pondering stuff by

Sunday, May 10th, 2009

ridiculous hallmark holiday edition

when i was a little girl, they gave out carnations at church on Mother’s Day. white if your mother was deceased, pink if she was alive. my mother’s was white, mine, trailing beside her, obviously pink.  they were crinkly and soft, the flowers, little pom pom indicators. these days, Oscar tags along to church with […]

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Thursday, May 7th, 2009

but tell it slant

every year on the 30th of April, Dave’s parents set the lobster traps.  out to sea, to open the season. some part of me finds this fitting, that this day is also the date of Finn’s death. blood inheritance and heritage and salt water all swirl around incoherently in my imagination, making me wish i […]

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