Comments on: independence

By: do not go gentle | cribchronicles.com

do not go gentle | cribchronicles.com — Mon, 11 Jan 2010 03:06:37 +0000

[...] kitchen wall sits lonely, waiting for an opportunity to unleash the wrath of its radiation. he has not cooked since she died. not using that microwave may be the secret of his [...]

By: Beck

Beck — Mon, 25 May 2009 13:48:03 +0000

Lovely post. Your grandfather sounds like my husband’s grandfather, who is now fed by his daughters.

My husband handles ALL of the financial stuff. ALL of it. I know this is not right, but my parents teetered on the edge of bankruptcy all through my childhood and I now find all financial things… distressing. So there’s no way this could possibly go wrong for me, right? (he keeps all of the financial stuff in a clearly marked folder, should I ever need it.)

Also, driving. I don’t drive, either.

By: Holly

Holly — Mon, 25 May 2009 13:31:41 +0000

I’m sitting here adoring your grandfather.

Can Maid Marian’s set up at the community market in the meanwhile? I hope it reopens soon.

By: misty

misty — Sat, 23 May 2009 12:23:48 +0000

When my grandfather died last summer, I was surprised and pleased to see my grandmother trying new things. Things my grandfather would never allow in his old fashion farmers mind. (if he didn’t understand it, then they didnt’ need it) My grandmother joined facebook and learned to surf and email. Now she can keep up to date with the goings on of her grandchildren, which aren’t just down the road anymore, but across the globe. Now, it’s my father who won’t go near facebook. Which gives me reason to tease.

My folks are pretty up to date with stuff, running their own businesses, but I remember being stunned as a kid when I learned that my Mom could fix my bike. My dad wasn’t home, wouldn’t be all day, so Mom said she’d fix it. Well, that just changed my thinking forever. Girls can fix things too, and use tools and actually be quite good at it. Huh, go figure.

If my kids teach me anything I think it will be socially. That area seems to be the hardest to change and learn.

By: Damselfly

Damselfly — Sat, 23 May 2009 04:56:33 +0000

Aw. So sad.

Amazed and intrigued at how you can turn a town — a family — tragedy into thoughts about what the next generation will have to teach us.

By: Lindsey

Lindsey — Sat, 23 May 2009 04:21:42 +0000

Recently an elderly man came into the natural food store where I work. He asked me how long he should cook his brown rice, and after I gave him directions he told me that his wife had died a little over a year ago, and that he was trying to teach himself how to cook.

“I do alright,” he said. “I’m probably about as good as she was when she was thirteen or so. Oh, she was a good cook…”

There wasn’t much more to be said.

By: flutter

flutter — Sat, 23 May 2009 01:00:04 +0000

it is important to maintain your borders. just sayin’.

Your poor grandfather, I just wanna hug him

By: anymommy

anymommy — Fri, 22 May 2009 23:32:05 +0000

First, this is lovely, I was rapt learning about your grandfather.

Second, it’s so interesting because I am a part of a new book club and at the meeting the other night we somehow got on the subject of infidelity, mostly by husbands. Two of the woman – who had established careers as doctors – said they would walk away the minute they found out. Another woman and I waffled. I really don’t know. It would rock my world. I have three young kids and I’m pregnant. I used to be able to support myself, but yikes.

Never thought I’d find my independent self feeling that way – and I have a pretty good education – it was interesting.

By: Mama G

Mama G — Fri, 22 May 2009 21:11:11 +0000

Although losing your grandfather’s “other home” is sad to hear about, there is something about this post that makes me happy. I’m pretty sure it’s the image I’ve conjured up in my head of your granfather telling the waitresses to “stay pure” …

I think I might be in love with your grandfather :-)

By: thordora

thordora — Fri, 22 May 2009 20:32:29 +0000

I hear that. After Mom died, Dad couldn’t cook, drive, do the bills, clean, anything. He brought home the bacon, and kept the house in good repair. She kept the house, gave him his allowance, did the shopping. Very 1955.

And then, she died. And we realized we’d starve. Slowly, he learned to cook (sorta). He took driving lessons and learned to drive. He decided he could live with a certain level of filth (something that drives my husband nuts since I learned it too). Somehow he rose to most of the challenge.

I should pay more attention to the banking stuff, but to me, it’s the ONE thing I don’t handle. I could if I had to. But I deal with everything else in the house, and frankly, I don’t want to. Just like my husband could and does, when needed, deal with everything else. He just doesn’t want to.

That’s sad for your grandpa. My father has his haunt, and he’s be so crushed if it left.